Learning about each other we can have true relations
Spam is annoying. But I can’t help but smile at the effort spammers are putting in to get me to give them my bank details. They’re pretending to be real people, and emailing me to offer me money. Lots and lots of money.
They pretend to be people like Abuba Abda, from the Bank of Africa in Ouagadougou. He wanted me to have 40 per cent of $2,500,00. He discovered it in an account belonging to a deceased customer of the bank, ‘who was involved in the December 25th 2003 Benin plane crash’. He even gave me a link to the CNN website, so I could read about the crash too (just in case I didn’t believe him). He never told me what he meant by ‘involved’ though.
But not all of the emails I get are from people wanting to give me money.
I got an email with ‘lots of love’ from my ‘new friend’ Alicia. She wrote:
‘It really pleases me to write you for a lovely and sincere friendship even if we haven't met or seen each other before. I will so much appreciate to see your reply soon, so that we can share pictures and know more about ourselves’.
And Alena, who sometimes wrote her name Elena. A dating agency asked her what kind of men she likes, and they said she should talk to me. ‘Maybe learning more about each other we can have true relations. I want to search my love. I want to have true relations.’ Did I mention I’m not a man?
It seems to me these spammers are missing a trick. They’ve had a bit of a half baked idea here – let’s pretend to be a real person to gain a sympathy vote and to build up some trust... but let’s write in a way that no real person would.
You’d never say my aim of contacting you is to solicit your cooperation and assistance based on one of the accounts under my management. Or I got your contact from the internet, while searching for an honest and trustworthy person who will assist me to implement this transfer. They’re just words gone wrong. No real person would say them. These spammers need to write like they speak. Or they’ll never find anyone to give all that money to.
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